We had an amazing eve of Noel. Now I am super stressed out. Because of my emails to my GP and other people. I spoke to BJG about my latest fantasy but maybe I should not have. I feel physically ill tonight: cant sleep, heady, nauseous. I just vomited. My health , physical too, is not the greatest. I just popped a half zopiclone (sleeping pill) and we'll see if it kicks in. About 20 pills lasted me for 1.5 year. I dont need much of it at all nor often. But I am stressing out a lot tonight about last week's fantasies I shared with emails to private people. I was so very much on a stoner trip. I have to quit the weed for over a year. It is urgent. Last week I really was not doing well. And God only knows what trip I was on about my long ago social worker and so many other people.

On a Noel note, we received three teapots this year and one pitcher thermos for  tea and teas. Not sure what we will do with three teapots but one is super nice and one is super durable.