Sigh. I went to bed at around 10:30pm. I keep meditating while I sleep but I woke having  to go pee. No news from anyone. I am alone with my dog whiskey in the pre dawn. I have to go get melatonines today. I feel slack today. Like I am overwhelm by the injustices of our system for the marginalized like me, but just want to sleep it off. I am so worried if ever I have anohter conniption where hubby calls the ambulance. I think the cops may very well kill me that time. They are so very violent in BC in my home and look like they only come to beat me up instead of helping me get to the hospital.