not at God at all though I hope....but at this corrupt system.

where you have to fucking be killed for you to be compensated for very deep wrongs done. THIS is what pisses me off. And  a little be the fact that I have been led to believe by inspiration of God only, no one ever said it for sure, that I would be a millionaire one day in this lifetime. This croyance was so strong it stupidely disappoints me to the max when I neve win at lotto.

I dont know why God wants me to believe all this crap. This is the only thing I dont like in my mind today: wanting millions of dollars, 2 or 21 or whatever.