Argh, I had too many bloody caesars today: I am on my third after4 -5 hours. I am totally vanquished by the booze but I like the feeling. I so am far from the land of dalai lama rebirths I entertained in the last few years. THIS life is what interests me these days. It has become pretty intense with learning the death of a good person I knew for many years recently this year. It came as quite the shock though I always suspected he would die young since I have known them. Their story was so purely idyllic, I could not beleive God would give them 70 years together all along so in love only and always. Though I certainly did not think that at their wedding. But over the years, I realized their degree of perfect match made in heaven was unheard of by me anywhere else. call me fatalistic. I certainly am. Hubby got upset when I explained this theory.  I am passionate and intense and know life , real world, is excruciatingly hard in fact. That is all. Good night, world.