Holy shit, I just started ranting about my parents and such nonsense about my mental health to a good friend i actually wanted to hear instead of speak or rant with. I really started rambling suddenly. I had nothing to say i guess , just half fomred thoughts of my sleepy head. Pathetic. Anyway, poor guy I really have to learn to shut up even when I dont know, especially, what to say. Its fine, it is too late to call Montreal from BC. He said the timing was right when I called, on his way back from night shift. So I called. I feel like such garbage for not having listened to him. I am so fucking mad and tired. All I do is rant to anyone who shows interest and listens. Even when I promised myslef to listen. I must have a huge ego. May God help me become an expert listener. Especially when I want to get to know again someone I have not seen for 30 years.