A great anguish befalls me tonight

With all this ignorance, my own, revealed

i fear the punishments

The last few nights have been heavy with negativity

as I open my eye for a fraction of minutes

I am much appalled at my bad behaviour

in writing and words

Where did I learn such uncouth ways?

Certainly not from my family

The dew pearls on the grass

but regrets shower me with ice

and I am left

mortified

to have missed out so very much

on simply loving and caring with kindness

all those I met

My only simple redemption for the night:

sober evening

and dreams

to really feel the weight of space and time

and of everyday's doodlings