...is of course chinese.

For the LONGEST time after puberty, japanese man and woman (though I still was left coldby women then) aesthetic biological typical traits really attracted me. Never ever sexually. I felt like I was always too much of a pig for this look. Turht is japan I hear is ultra sexist. Anyway, I was neverever fucking allowed close to japan but it haunted me all my youth. Dogen was a poet God to me. It is truly because of the rigid gender roles that I could not feel good at Tozenji. If I had been a beautiful fancy woman with the look of fancy, I would have felt way more comfotable. But I appeared as a pig, quite simply. Tidiness is NOT godliness. But it is sure soothing for the eye. And welcoming of strangers.