I know it sounds hard to believe when I am having actually so much fun online.

I said once martyrs have more fun than saints. he he he....something to have fun with and consider for all of us unlucky douche bags in our lifetimes. I may have been a martyr and will die like one I hope to make sense and proof of it all. But know I have basically been on holiday all my life following heavy heavy traumas.

THAT and complete freedom to some extent were the fun conditions.