I should start thinking about bed time. Should I take another half sleeping pill like last night? I would rather not. Even if that means staying up late and being tempted by cigarettes a lot more de facto. No, I dont think I will take zopiclone tonight. I take it rarely when I dont have a sleep disorder like in january when off pot. 

I have not spoken to hubby all day. I give him time to come around. I do hope he does. He has a meeting tomorrow and a talk by a friendly colleague. Billy is on the sofa (red sofa) with me. The patio door is open again since I smoked just now. 

Though I am tired a bit, I feel adventurous. I dont know for what though. For writing poetry maybe?

THOUGHTS::::

(The hunger is sitting in my navel

The dog is farting next to me , asleep

The sounds of the street echo in the distance

Faraway sirens are heard

I am alive by Golly and that feels alright!)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There was once an old woman

who said

nothing but good things

to everyone

she never spoke of her deep solitude

Her woes, her sadnesses

but in words written down on a page

I dont know why I think of her

a Grand mother of a sort in her own right

No one knew her, told me her son

she was the most secretive person you'd know

Tonight as I sit with dog and hunger

and start daydreaming about a bowl of cereals with strawberries

I remember this old lady

and weep sadly -

 though she was loved , we all thought

no one knew her mind