Yes, I have been chainsmoking joints all night. Something I usually dont do in the last while. I seem to indulge everything tonight, cigarettes too. 

But lets get back to why i am on this post right now. I had something to say. 

Yes, I dont know if it is appropriate if I dont want to confuse people reading this blog. It was something strictly for me that i wanted to write. I wont say it tonight to you all. It is my secret. 

But you all have read that I was convinced my favourite young pup, Billy, with us since august 21st, 2021, was my favourite grandpa. Who else but my mother's adoptive dad?This pup is my true joy of motherhood given by god. My rebirth as a crazy (as crazy as me) wolf is where I am going after this one. It is great i think: I am used already to the crazy wisdom energy so I am ready. Billy will be my wolf pup and my cat, whom I think is my mother's biological mother, will be my female pup. 

Even if you are not buddhist, dont you see the beauty and family relation so deep in humanity in such stories as above, if only as inspirtaion to guide us all in our lives if we are crazy wisdom enough like tibetan enjoy so much?