What to make of my mental health? In the last 2-3 weeks, its been good overall. after July 22nd. I dont know what causes these conniptions. Life at home is very much not stressful overall. I don't get it. My disease has transformed with the years. I was infatuated with someone else, a weirdo nice dude i never ever kissed, for 15 years when i was 19. The intensity of the infatuation of this acquaintance was kept secret for about 10 and for 5 I started ranting about it. To get it out of my system. Mostly in my diaries at home. It worked. After that, however, I became used to ranting whatever I wanted, without any censorship, on tumblr. And that became a whole new path to my disease...being rude to everyone by saying anything I felt like, even made up stuff i believed at the time...its been awful. For me and for everyone else who got attacked by my emails. 2016-2018 was the worst i think. It was hell at home. Hubby wanted divorce and I had not a single friend to speak to nor my parents. We've been through a lot in BC. It was in fact super hard to adjust. And I totally blew it socially with new friends we could have made.