I see now that i am totally foolish though I have good intentions.

This indulgence of my dream world is stupid though it made me happy and excited.

I am not that holy more than you, everyone: I am too foolish for that. It is easy to feel wise and holy when you are as stone as me every day.

False beliefs about one self simply.

It is necessary that I be more sober now but it is impossible to do for me it looks like. I have  no free will on that front and everythig is a HUGE effort. I do harm reduction here and there but it is not enough.